Here is a great ad I found on CraigsList for a girl Looking for a small dick and a LARGE dick

Im looking for 2 dicks to come join me for some fun this friday. Im looking for a small dick. Im talking so small that you pee on your nutts when you take a piss. You will be tied up humiliated and teased while i tie off your balls with a rope. Im going to humiliate your dick and make it feel stupid, because im a bitch like that. I want to tease you untill you cant take it anymore. Then im going to let BIG dick fuck me while you watch so he can show you how its done. After he is done fucking you can come in and finish me off.

So basically im looking for 2 guys, one has to have a tiny dick, and the other has to have a big and i mean big dick, 10 inches or better. You must be open to group sex, and be submissive, just do what i fucking tell you and there wont be a problem. You must be disease free, I really dont care what you look like, im fucking your dick not your face.

Here are the requirements: In the email either type "small dick" or "LARGE dick" in the title (so i know what category you fall under) No one liners or horrible grammer. You must include your age, gender, and if you are available this friday night A pic is a must. (how do i know how big or pathetic your dick is?) You must do exactly what I instruct you to. (im the boss, get that right bitch) If you can meet these requirements, we need to talk. If you dont I will delete your email.

I know im a bitch, and im demanding, but guess what? Your horny, and i got the pussy, so it looks like your fucked.

Now about me im 29 I live in fullerton near Harbor and Orangethorpe, I can host. Im white, green eyes, jet black hair, im five eight", 137, 36C's, ive got a slim waist, long legs, and a tight ass pussy and ass.

Posted to Craig's List Personals:
To the Guy Who Mugged Me Downtown (Downtown, Savannah )
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Reply to:  [?]
Date: 2009-01-06, 3:43AM EST

I was the white guy with the black Burrberry jacket that you demanded I hand over shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I hope you somehow come across this message. I'd like to apologize.

I didn't expect you to crap your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a reason that evening, and it wasn't that cold outside. You see, my girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber 1911 .45 ACP pistol for Christmas, and we had just picked up a shoulder holster for it that evening. Beautiful pistol, eh? It's a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head, isn't it?

I know it probably wasn't a great deal of fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge flopping about in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse since you also ended up leaving your shoes, cellphone, and wallet with me. I couldn't have you calling up any of your buddies to come help you try to mug us again. I took the liberty of calling your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, and explaining to her your situation. I also bought myself some gas on your card. I gave your shoes to one of the homeless guys over by Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all of the cash in your wallet, then I threw the wallet itself in a dumpster.

I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell. They'll be on your bill in case you'd like to know which ones. Alltel recently shut down the line, and I've only had the phone for a little over a day now, so I don't know what's going on with that. I hope they haven't permanently cut off your service. I was about to make some threatening phone calls to the DA's office with it. Oh well.

So, about your pants. I know that I was a little rough on you when you did this whole attempted mugging thing, so I'd like to make it up to you. I'm sure you've already washed your pants, so I'd like to help you out. I'd like to reimburse you for the detergent you used on the pants. What brand did you use, and was it liquid or powder? I'd also like to apologize for not killing you and instead making you walk back home humiliated. I'm hoping that you'll reconsider your choice of path in life. Next time you might not be so lucky. If you read this message, email me and we'll do lunch and laundry. Peace!
 
- Alex