by Mr. Phucked
12/11/2007 9:30:00 PM
Almost every male and every carpet muncher has gone down on a girl.
Oh I'm sorry, to be politically correct, carpet muncher should be Lesbian.
Picture the scene…
You and your vaginal date have eaten a wonderful dinner, downed some wine and now she is back at your place.
You make some moves and magically she appears in your bedroom, naked.
You're both lying on the bed kissing passionately. You slowly move down her body, kissing and caressing her breasts and finally you reach her inner thighs. You prepare yourself to devour her and show her why she dated you.
Your lips lock with her "lips" and suddenly you notice the most vile odor the likes of which you have not smelled since,…well nothing has smelled this bad,…
You start to cough and barf almost reaches your lips.
What should you do?
Since she is at your place you cannot run, so you're pretty much phucked!
This leaves one of two possible solutions:
Option A
Pretend to only tease the vaginal area and move onto another area like her legs, behind her knees etc.
After 10 minutes of doing this you can tell her you do not feel well and go to the bathroom.
This will result in saving her feelings and she will hopefully leave pretty soon, especially if you tell her you have diarrhea from the dinner you ate!
Option B
Stop immediately and tell her that her vagina smells like rotting sushi and ask her when she last showered.
This will result in complete shock in her face and a prompt slapping of your face. She will dress rapidly while crying and get the hell out of your place as soon as possible.
After years of therapy she will be back in the dating pool and someone else's problem.
Option A or B will depend on how much of a bastard you are. The choice is yours…
Coming next week on That's Phucked. The causes and remedies of Vaginal Odor.
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