That's Phucked

Vaginal Odor and Dating

Almost every male and every carpet muncher has gone down on a girl.
Oh I'm sorry, to be politically correct, carpet muncher should be Lesbian.

Picture the scene…
You and your vaginal date have eaten a wonderful dinner, downed some wine and now she is back at your place.
You make some moves and magically she appears in your bedroom, naked.

You're both lying on the bed kissing passionately.  You slowly move down her body, kissing and caressing her breasts and finally you reach her inner thighs.  You prepare yourself to devour her and show her why she dated you.
Your lips lock with her "lips" and suddenly you notice the most vile odor the likes of which you have not smelled since,…well nothing has smelled this bad,…
You start to cough and barf almost reaches your lips.
What should you do?

Since she is at your place you cannot run, so you're pretty much phucked!
This leaves one of two possible solutions:

Option A
Pretend to only tease the vaginal area and move onto another area like her legs, behind her knees etc.
After 10 minutes of doing this you can tell her you do not feel well and go to the bathroom.
This will result in saving her feelings and she will hopefully leave pretty soon, especially if you tell her you have diarrhea from the dinner you ate!

Option B
Stop immediately and tell her that her vagina smells like rotting sushi and ask her when she last showered.
This will result in complete shock in her face and a prompt slapping of your face.  She will dress rapidly while crying and get the hell out of your place as soon as possible.
After years of therapy she will be back in the dating pool and someone else's problem.

Option A or B will depend on how much of a bastard you are.  The choice is yours…

Coming next week on That's Phucked.  The causes and remedies of Vaginal Odor.
Remember, if you like our article, Digg us!
 

Comments (15) -

Bloggerfreak
United States Bloggerfreak

Awesome!
I've been there before!!  I chose option C, just go for it!

Reply

I SWEAR!!!!! This article BETTER not be about me!  I hope you are not speaking from personal experience.  

What about the woman who is sexy as hell and tastes like candy that you can eat all night???????  I don't see any articles about her.  

"Felicia"

Reply

LOL
No, it's not about you!  Sweet as candy, yes Wink

Am I speaking from experience?  Yes, I am.  I was with a girl once who really did smell bad, really bad!!  The barf was really close.  All my stories are based on fact and have happended to me or someone I know very well and trust that the source is true!

Reply

hello please send me orginal shape of vagina,no fucking vagina.like 12 years girls vagina's pictures.can u send me at my mail address.i am waiting of reply

Reply

inXg0thXweXtrust
inXg0thXweXtrust

option c

Reply

hey, this chick sounds really familiar....

but i agree w/faith, where's the story about the girl whose vagina is so sweet and tasty that you want to permanently superglue your face between her legs?

Reply

My husband always says I taste like candy... I wonder if he's lying to make me feel good?  I don't know about other women, but I'm petrified of any smell there.  Being bi, seriously, this has only happened to me once, and thankfully, I had been drinking a lot, so I pretended to fall asleep on her thigh, then slowly roll off.  It was pretty cool.  The cop-out, not the raunch.  ^_^

Reply

To prevent this sort of thing from ever happening again, give it "the 'ol scratch 'n sniff". As you begin kissing and caressing, trail you hand downwards and give a little "scratch". Then, as you work your hand back up, give the "sniff test". Then you can decide before you "dive in" if the "cod" is fresh or not!!!

Reply

haha, been there done that! My best friend and i were at a party together, I was playing "wingman". It's really easy to get a guy friend laid when you're a chick. Hooked his ass up with the drunk girl who we both vaguely knew. After a long night of drinking, they went, they phucked. Took a break, he had gone done on her and she was rancid enough to make him vomit...right there, in that chick's vag, not just around it, or on it, but in it...she was dripping vomit from her cooter. IT WAS AWESOME! all she did was get up, go to the shower, rinse it out of her, came back and took him back up there. Most disgusting thing i've ever seen. It put a smile on my face.  

Reply

Some advice from my good friend Stephanie:
If ya got "Clitty Litter" in yer underwear, yer "Pussy Box" might need a cleanin!!

Reply

LOLOLOLOL!!!!! I think I pee'd myself!!!

Reply

IF I WAS A DUDE, I WOULD PROMPTHLY CHOOSE B. I WOULD TELL HER TO EITHER GET HER RANK ASS IN THE SHOWER OR GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE. I MEAN REALLY HOW COULD SHE NOT KNOW HER SHIT WAS FUNKY? I THINK SHE DID THAT TO YOU ON PURPOSE. YOU SHOULDA BEAT HER ASS THEN KICKED HER OUT. LMFAO. NASTY BITCH.

Reply

Repost.

Reply

what the fuck is with kkj.has any1 else noticed what hes written.filthy phucken pedo

Reply

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